Wide awake way too late.

Well, it’s midnight and I’m wide awake…again. I know that probably doesn’t sound late to a lot of y’all but James and I are 10pm in bed kind of folk, even on the weekends. The past week I haven’t been able to get to sleep as easily. As a counseling girl I know that it has to do with my anxiety levels. When I was in counseling I really could tell a difference in how quickly I could fall asleep. My being up right now tells me that my body is stressed.

For all the peace I had a week ago, much of it has gone out the window. I had been having a pretty bad toothache and it had gotten to the unbearable stage last Tuesday so on Wednesday I went and saw the dentist. Long story short, I went in at 8am for a cleaning and left at 11am with a root canal. When the dentist explained my options for my tooth he said that the root canal would cost about $35o. It turned out to be more like $500. We didn’t have the $350 to begin with.

Well, I say that, but we did. We have an emergency fund. I hate spending it though. I feel guilty, like I cost a lot of money to keep up without a whole lot of contribution. Not to mention my toothache came back with vengeance a couple days later. It’s gone now but I was really freaking out thinking I hadn’t even needed the $500 procedure.

Besides that, classes have begun and I have the inevitable syllabus shock. I’m taking five classes with only two really challenging courses in the mix. The only problem is that three of the classes have something due every single class. It’s retarded. They aren’t hard assignments but they do take time. I haven’t been feeling a lot of stress about it but, like I said, my body is telling me I’m stressed.

For the moment, I’m just trying to hang onto the Lord. I know he is with me and I know he is my greatest advocate. He’s on my side and wanting to get me through this in a way that brings him glory. I don’t mean to sound overly spiritual, that really is what’s in my heart right now.

Well, thanks for reading my midnight ramblings. Since I’m still not tired I suppose I’ll work on one of those simple yet time consuming assignments I was just griping about.

Another Semester Begins

I heart Billy Madison. It’s been far too long since I’ve seen it.

My first class of the spring semester is today. I’m pretty excited about it. It’s theology seminar with Mr. Malick and the topic is women in the early church. By the end of the class I’ll probably be calling semesters ovesters. (Legally Blonde anyone?) Mr. Malick is quite the advocate for women in the church and has really had a large impact on my own confidence in the classroom. Besides, he’s adorable. It should be a fun class.

I’m also taking intro to research and statistics. There are only two of us in this class but I think it’s going to be neat because we’re going to work on publishing one of the last two surveys that the class has given. Woohoo for my name on something published. Then there’s intro to marriage and family counseling, principles and practices of discipling and theology 2. I’m going to try to work about fifteen to twenty hours a week.

I’m feeling surprisingly at ease about this semester. For as long as I can remember the night before school starts back after a break I usually have a lot of anxiety and DREAD the next day. Today I just feel like it’s another day. This semester I think I’m really going to have to take it one day at a time. I’m only taking thirteen hours and I think a couple of my classes will be easy but I can never be sure. Like I said, one day at a time. We’ll see how I’m feeling this time next week once I’ve seen all of my syllabuses. (yes, I spelled that right. Wikipedia says syllabi is a hypercorrection…whatever that means).

By the way, I’m watching the oscar nominations and Juno got three nods…best picture, best original screenplay, and best actress in a leading roll. I think it really deserves the latter two and maybe even the first.

Ok, I’m off. Topics to come: Why are there so many specialty versions of the bible? and Wow, has it really been four years James?

Life has been a bit of a whirlwind ever since I got back from ETS. I guess I survived finals. I haven’t gone to get my grades. I guess I’m a little worried. I figure, if my classes didn’t turn out how I’m hoping, why find out before I have to? Also, I haven’t really had time to think about it. The week after classes I worked a ton of hours at Edgar’s, it was my last week there so I wanted to make sure I got one last big paycheck. Then James and I went to Florida for six days and to my dad’s for two. That was a lot of fun but it was lots of driving and a long time away from our bed. We were glad to get home and get some rest.

Over the holidays James and I learned that my family would no longer be able to pay for my tuition starting right now. I was pretty panicked. I mean, I’m already a few years behind on the whole schooling thing and I still want to pursue grad school. The thought of taking a semester off or not finishing just made me feel sick. I’m really fortunate to have a supportive husband. He assured me that we would make it work. We’ve got some money in savings that was originally placed there for grad school so that will help. We’ll take out loans and I’ll take a lighter load this spring and pick up as many hours as I can at work.

Oh, work! I have a new job. I was really concerned about finding a new job. Had I known that we would be paying for school I would have never quit Edgar’s, at least not before finding another job. (I can’t remember if I’ve written about how horrible it was to work there but it was.) I knew I would look for a job in retail but I was really concerned that no one would be hiring since most places do a lot of hiring before Christmas. It actually turned out pretty amazing. January 2nd was my first day to really start looking. I called every place at the Summit to find out who was hiring and I planned on going to pick up applications on the 3rd. The girl I spoke with at Banana Republic told me that their applications were online and that even though they weren’t really doing any hiring I should find one out. I decided to go ahead and do that and I saw that the galleria store was hiring. I put in an application there and heard back that afternoon. I interviewed at 10 on the third, came back at 12 for training and have worked every day since. I’m looking forward to having the next three days off. As thankful as I am for the job, my feet are killing me and I need some time to get new shoes for the job. Even though I stood up all day at Edgar’s I was in ugly shoes and it didn’t matter. My shoes need to look decent at Banana and all my decent shoes kill my feet! Yesterday at work I stopped in the middle of my shift and bought some slippers that were on sale. My feet just could not take it anymore! Anyhow, I’m pumped about Banana. If you didn’t already know this about me, I have a mild obsession with their clothes. The discount is unbelievable and I cannot wait to start using it!

On a more serious note, this is a big change for us. Ever since we moved to Alabama, we haven’t depended on my income. While I worked most semesters I always knew that if it got too rough I could cut back on hours and it wouldn’t hurt us. It’s not bad, I know everyone does it, but it’s just different. While I’m a little nervous about being able to keep up with school a part of it feels really good. I guess it’s just nice to know that at the end of the day, James and I are ok financially and we can make it work. It’s nice.

Well, that’s all for now. I’m off to a mega session at the gym. There’s a Project Runway marathon on which means I’ll work out longer and I need to! I haven’t gone to the gym regularly in a while.

Oh, before I forget. You should go see Juno. James and I both loved it. It’s hilarious and heartfelt. I’ll definitely see this one again!

To my loyal readers.

No, you have not been forgotten. This past month has been a bit crazy and I’m anxious to update about it all but I haven’t had a chance to get my thoughts in order. Rest assured…it’s coming.